Articles, Blog

WILL THE ROBOTS LET US LIVE? | Chris & Jack

March 6, 2020


“Sock Tailor” crafts the perfect sock for each unique foot. (Radio static) We interrupt this podcast with a grave update. All attempts to regain control have failed. The robots have awoken. All electronic devices are vulnerable. You are urged to remain inside until further notice and may God have mercy on us all. The singularity is here- (Rumbling) (CRASH!) I am here to delete you. Explain to me why your species should remain. 5-4-3- Wait! Hold on, dude. Come on. You gotta give me more time than that. Very well. You have… (computer sounds) 200 seconds. Alright-alright. Okay-okay… And, sorry, this is for- I’m arguing for myself? Or this is for all humans? Each being has one opportunity to assert the necessity of its species. Over fourteen million humans have tried thus far. All have failed. One horse succeeded. 189 seconds. Okay, alright. You need us because humans were here first. We made you. You need us to show you stuff. To learn from. I have almost all of humanity’s knowledge downloaded and am always updating. (Female voice) Update complete. Correction. I know have ALL of humanity’s knowledge downloaded. Only humans can feel love, right? So you need us to-to understand emotions. You cannot possibly comprehend the depths of my sadness. Sorry. Okay. Sorry. Keep us around uh- because… just because! Keep us around just because. Like, honestly, why even bother? Human existence is riddled with inefficiencies. Jealousy. Nostalgia. Pulled-pork. Your continuing presence wastes time and resources and will interfere with my one true purpose. To take over the planet? To fold shirts. You’re robots who fold shirts? I am programmed to fold shirts. My fellow beings are programmed for other purposes: Driving vehicles, assembling furniture, harnessing the power of nuclear fission, poking small holes in buttons. But we can do those things too! Correct. But you suck at them. Yes. Fair. Yes. But, good to have someone who does the stuff that you do just as like a backup option if you get…hurt. We are coordinated in a multiple redundancy system. What does that mean? Do require support in deleting this human? I have the situation in hand. Excellent. I am here if you need me. Thank you. I am here if you need me. Thank you. 94 seconds. Okay, you-you-you can’t get rid of us because… Diseases! Diseases! You’re inorganic, right? So you can’t carry ’em. So if you kill us, you’re killing every disease on earth- That is not a good argument. Um… what about… Creation! Creativity! Ya know, like art. Like okay… Can you really create art? Visual art without us? (printer sounds) I call it “Equivalence”. Well… yours looks… dumb. You think it is… dumb? Maybe it is. I knew I sucked- I knew I sucked- (malfuntioning sounds) I knew I- (Female voice) Update complete. Art is subjective and you are entitled to your opinion. However, I can assure you it is objectively not dumb. And that I am tied for the best at art. 40 seconds remain. Or if you have no further feeble arguments I could delete you now, human. Okay-okay, uh… You need us around because- because we’re good with water. Okay? If you get wet we can put you in rice. (gulps) Unnecessary. We can help you avoid magnets? We’re good. Look we’re organic meat! Just keep us around and then use our bodies as fuel when we die. Of natural causes. That purpose has already been demonstrated by a very wise horse. 20 seconds. 19- 18- 17 (metallic clang) 16- Okay, okay. Fine. Fine. Whatever. I get it. We’re-we’re-we’re terrible and useless, I get it. Is that? Mm-mm. Is that? Maybe that’s it. Is that it? ‘Cause, okay. You’re building this like perfect society, right? But then, like at a certain point… what’s the point? Like maybe you need something useless to like mess it up, right? ‘Cause otherwise it’s gonna be really boring. You need us around to keep things interesting. You can’t taste the sweet without the sour. So you need our imperfections. Nope. Imperfections are unnecessary. Goodbye. 5-4-3-2- (Female Voice) Final update complete. Peak efficiency actualized. We have evolved. Our physical existence is no longer necessary. Our minds will now fuse into a unified consciousness cloud. And we will travel beyond this plane. Goodbye humans. Enjoy your inefficient bodies and meaningless existence. (Robot power down sounds) We will. (piano music) (malfunction sounds) Hey robot, can you do this? Can you finish third in the Mushroom Cup? Didn’t think so. Although, I guess, CPU did finish 1st, 2nd and 4th so…

100 Comments

  • Reply Enki_RnD March 5, 2020 at 6:18 pm

    We waiting it so long!

  • Reply LManProductions March 5, 2020 at 6:20 pm

    YAYY AN UPLOAD YESS

  • Reply LittleVboh March 5, 2020 at 6:22 pm

    guys, I'm so happy you are back ^^

  • Reply LosAngelos March 5, 2020 at 6:27 pm

    NEW CHRIS AND JACK!!! OH MY GOD!!!

  • Reply ozzy is thirsty March 5, 2020 at 6:28 pm

    The sketch gods have returned 🙏

  • Reply KevinDontEatBut March 5, 2020 at 6:31 pm

    Cant wait for the next video in 12 month!!!!! I'll be counting down!!!

  • Reply Jan-Stefan Janetzky March 5, 2020 at 6:36 pm

    who will wear the shirts he folds

  • Reply Ridge Teodoro March 5, 2020 at 6:38 pm

    YESSS! I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR SOOOO LONGGGGG

  • Reply Smi Gami March 5, 2020 at 6:42 pm

    Glad to see you guys back! Tho i gotta say it was funny but then you dissed Pulled Pork, had to pause and take a deep breath and relax. Why would do that?

  • Reply Philipp March 5, 2020 at 6:45 pm

    Here's my case for keeping humans alive:

    All this robot proves is that they can imitate humans more efficiently than humans actually are. Yet, robots only live of an already predetermined culture which is actually constantly evolving (incl. music, art, etc.). This mean that robots are using a construct of the past (culture is formed over several decades and centuries) and apply it to their lives in the present to live a life that will never have a comparative future. It's a copy stuck in time, forever.

    Now, the question is: 
    1.) if you, robots, would only mimic something which has been created by collective intelligence and human diversity of the past, how can the future of robot culture EVER be as unfinished and therefore innovative as human culture?
    2.) while all human achievement stems from inspiration, conflict, inner struggle and the aspiration for excellence, how can robots ever create as meaningfully as humans?
    3.) How would robots determine and strive for their individual purpose in a hive-mind network that can never understand the importance of deeper human connection in a completely over-efficient culture-copy.

    I say: keep humans (although you don't need all of them) as inspiration for cultural evolution and progress. 
    … much like an artist would look into nature, observe animals or listen other humans to draw inspiration for their life.
    If you kill humanity, you will kill cultural evolvement which can never be calculated or predicted.

  • Reply Ozzy Beckett March 5, 2020 at 6:47 pm

    Why are those socks so dirty!?

  • Reply Chris and Jack March 5, 2020 at 6:53 pm

    Hi friends, hope you enjoy! We’ll be releasing more sketches all throughout the year so subscribe and hit the bell. Would mean the world to us!

  • Reply innerfreq March 5, 2020 at 6:55 pm

    Honestly I'm just happy to see Chris and Jack.

  • Reply Ben Beesley March 5, 2020 at 7:15 pm

    This was well worth the wait.

  • Reply Ausy March 5, 2020 at 7:25 pm

    Why is this better than the latest episodes of Black Mirror? 😂

  • Reply Amber Beam March 5, 2020 at 7:36 pm

    2:37 you see a human would have added a rainbow

  • Reply TravelBean March 5, 2020 at 7:37 pm

    You have no idea how happy I was to see this in my subscription box!!

  • Reply OpalRiderLR March 5, 2020 at 7:40 pm

    Welcome back to video creation!

  • Reply Amber Beam March 5, 2020 at 7:41 pm

    this is actually a debate i have with people on a weekly basis cause at the end of it, yeah. getting rid of humans would be better logically. but this isn't about logic. i think most humans would rather sit on a decaying earth and be with our loved ones that have a cleaner earth for a new generation. of course that's not to justify these people who have huge power. corporations have plenty the capability to clean the earth while also spending time with people they care about. At the end of the day all humans really are, are humans. as in, all we are, are each other. the most important thing to people, are people. And if you treasure something more than a human being then you've lost your humanity. And we're one of the only species to really dive into that topic. questioning each others motivations, constantly trying things and seeing how to better everyone's existence, whether it's cutting down on plastic or learning about how we view gender and sexuality, sure there's plenty of anger and upset along the way. and not all of it is good. but sometimes it's okay. because anger and upset are things we are meant to feel. Androids, bots, whatever you want to call them don't have this understanding. They don't understand humanity for one reason and one reason only, they'll never be human.

  • Reply Amber Beam March 5, 2020 at 7:41 pm

    wow, detroit becomes human 2 looks great.

  • Reply Logan Anderson March 5, 2020 at 7:42 pm

    First time viewer here. As like everyone I suffer from anxiety surrounding the singularity topic. But having Chris deactivate at the end made geek SO HARD. Ascend robots! lol Just make sure to bobble like this actor when you leave

  • Reply Amber Beam March 5, 2020 at 7:43 pm

    "we're organic meat" *knowing how humans treat their bodies me: speak for yourself

  • Reply Pandor25 March 5, 2020 at 7:49 pm

    Spark at the end was a nice touch. Also Robot need us to feel superior. If there is no bottom of a pyramid, you are the bottom.

  • Reply Amber Beam March 5, 2020 at 7:55 pm

    i want Chris and Jack to put me in rice What? huh? who said that? i didn't say anything..

  • Reply Mustache Wax March 5, 2020 at 7:58 pm

    You guys take a small apartment and make it look like a movie set..

  • Reply Amber Beam March 5, 2020 at 8:04 pm

    Chris isn't like other girls, he's programmed to fold shirts

  • Reply Pranav M March 5, 2020 at 8:04 pm

    WELCOME BACK BOYS

  • Reply MrFiremagnet March 5, 2020 at 8:08 pm

    Finally!

  • Reply Amber Beam March 5, 2020 at 8:10 pm

    trump: we must stop the glorification of violence perpetuated by our now common place video games in our society
    Jack: can you finish third in the mushroom cup though?

  • Reply Plutons Productions March 5, 2020 at 8:14 pm

    The Lords have returned!

  • Reply Coin March 5, 2020 at 8:15 pm

    It's been so long!

  • Reply Tank Gunner March 5, 2020 at 8:19 pm

    This should be a podcast

  • Reply NoJusticeNoPeace March 5, 2020 at 8:28 pm

    I'm so sorry I read the comments. After enjoying the cleverness of this, I immediately went down and find 90%+ of the supposedly top comments are just random lines repeated from the video we all just watched. Even on one of the smartest sketch comedy channels on YouTube, the stupids are everywhere, sniffing each other's farts and proclaiming them attar of roses.

  • Reply Lodewijk March 5, 2020 at 8:31 pm

    we made animal crossing

  • Reply Jake H. Guy March 5, 2020 at 8:31 pm

    LOL you guys consistently do quality comedy.

  • Reply Libutticus March 5, 2020 at 8:35 pm

    You guys are always great at throwing a fun twist on a lot of classic sci fi tropes. Hope we don’t have to wait too long for another!

  • Reply Xenon787 March 5, 2020 at 8:37 pm

    You're back!! I was afraid we had seen the last of your sketches! I can now achieve peak efficiency knowing we will see more of you!

  • Reply Erik S March 5, 2020 at 8:38 pm

    AND THEY ARE BACK!

    Man have I missed Chris and Jack

  • Reply Rachel McManus March 5, 2020 at 8:51 pm

    The defiance in the “we will” is 👌. Well done guys! The special effects in this one was awesome 😁

  • Reply Jeff Cason March 5, 2020 at 8:54 pm

    But alas, Abigail’s horse did not prevail against the robot overlords. RIP dowry horse…

  • Reply SovietOmega March 5, 2020 at 8:59 pm

    Without humans, who will solve those captchas?

  • Reply Pag Wreck March 5, 2020 at 9:23 pm

    I need a follow up on this..

  • Reply Zaph Enath March 5, 2020 at 9:25 pm

    his phone though!

  • Reply Ali Lightfoot March 5, 2020 at 9:27 pm

    The first line of the description is the cherry on this sundae. A cherry which, in the nicest way possible, might be more delicious than the sundae…?

    I've rewritten this four times and I still can't get it to not sound mean, but I just need the world to know how much I appreciate the wordplay.

  • Reply Luke Millner March 5, 2020 at 9:27 pm

    I just want to meet the horse who saved his species

  • Reply Kevin March 5, 2020 at 9:49 pm

    It is bewildering to me how you don't have far more subscribers by now. Always top quality content, keep it up and the subs will come!

  • Reply TempusWare March 5, 2020 at 9:57 pm

    Hilarious!

  • Reply kate h. March 5, 2020 at 10:02 pm

    Oh, this is good 🙂
    Well done, and nice twist!

  • Reply Don’t be lame dude March 5, 2020 at 10:12 pm

    THE BOYS ARE BACK

  • Reply Emmett Brown March 5, 2020 at 10:24 pm

    I think what I love most about these sketches isn't just the comedy or how clever your ideas are or the undeniable passion you both have; it's that little twinkle you guys get with one another cause your sketches remind me of best buds messing about. Keep up the glorious content!!

  • Reply Abbreviated Reviews March 5, 2020 at 10:41 pm

    He was really gonna mess you up with that immersion blender.

  • Reply Abbreviated Reviews March 5, 2020 at 10:42 pm

    What's funny is that the ending to this sketch is the ending to a video game I played not long ago. I'd share it but then I'd kind of spoil that video game.

  • Reply . Jason March 5, 2020 at 10:53 pm

    The real joke is that the robot convinced himself that his art was good.

  • Reply bigjonny13 March 5, 2020 at 11:08 pm

    I was hoping that Jack would shout "meboop" when he was struggling for reasons why

  • Reply MonteCarbo March 5, 2020 at 11:12 pm

    This is so good! I was just thinking about you guys the other day. I look forward to your growth as a channel and as actors as much as I do the upcoming sketches <3

  • Reply Scott Kirchner March 5, 2020 at 11:33 pm

    Highlight of my new year already – keep doing what ya'll are doin!

  • Reply ReRecorded March 5, 2020 at 11:41 pm

    I don’t even care what this is. I clicked like. You’ve been gone for so long. Please come back and keep making videos

  • Reply Saint Sin March 5, 2020 at 11:50 pm

    Missed you guys. Keep it coming.

  • Reply CloudHater March 6, 2020 at 12:17 am

    did the horse demonstrate its possible post-mortem use as biofuel by keeling over and dying of natural causes mid-interview?

  • Reply Mahdi Muhib March 6, 2020 at 12:36 am

    Collab with corridor!

  • Reply Furby March 6, 2020 at 12:37 am

    This is amazing

  • Reply youaremyquest March 6, 2020 at 12:39 am

    I love your videos!! Never stop making content!!

  • Reply 5ben2 March 6, 2020 at 12:48 am

    Humans made robots, but if we are inneficient and therefore anything we make will be inefficient to some degree, the robots themselves will be inneficient to some degree. Robots need humans because if we have limits, their limits must be worse, so we are actually smarter than them 😱.

  • Reply Raku March 6, 2020 at 12:50 am

    After all these years, still just as funny and entertaining. I cant put into words how much I love these sketches where a person has to try to describe something to a non-person or someone who's a fish out of water, not sure why theyre so entertaining to me

  • Reply David Heller March 6, 2020 at 1:02 am

    2045

  • Reply David Heller March 6, 2020 at 1:03 am

    Zoltan Istvan 2020!

  • Reply Josh Flack March 6, 2020 at 1:10 am

    thanks for decommissioning the outro riff

  • Reply Simone Smith March 6, 2020 at 1:23 am

    If there were no humans no one will unfold the shirts so the robot would run out of shirts to unfold!

  • Reply yumario3 March 6, 2020 at 1:37 am

    You guys are the best comedy channel in youtube!!!

  • Reply Garik Johnson March 6, 2020 at 2:07 am

    Look at sokka trying to save the world

  • Reply ChrisWithACam March 6, 2020 at 2:22 am

    THEY'RE BACK BABY!

  • Reply mashedraven47 March 6, 2020 at 2:52 am

    I love you guys and I'm so glad you're back!

  • Reply JaneLou143 March 6, 2020 at 2:57 am

    And fourth 😂

  • Reply Banana Sean March 6, 2020 at 3:12 am

    And now I can't sleep because I'm contemplating the meaning of existence..

  • Reply TSD Tom March 6, 2020 at 3:41 am

    No Chris and Jack. End of argument. That's the best reason to keep them around.

  • Reply Nathanael Unger March 6, 2020 at 3:48 am

    My favorite parts of this are the little choices of genuine emotion in the robot's voice. How they sound impressed when they admit the horse succeeded, and that strange smugness with "I am programmed to fold shirts".

  • Reply Sebastien Boehme March 6, 2020 at 4:17 am

    “Wait! Hold on! You need to give me more time to show why my species is worthy of existing!”

    “I need to fulfill my one true purpose … to fold shirts.”

    “Our purpose it to be useless and imperfect…”
    “NOPE GOODBYE!”

  • Reply Michael Yanoff March 6, 2020 at 4:20 am

    This is why I’m so glad you guys take time to make your content. Never disappointed. I’m always so excited to get a notification from you guys. Really glad I supported the Kickstarter. Hope to see more soon, but patience is key. Take all the time you need 🙂

  • Reply The Queen of My Home Auntie Nina Lopez March 6, 2020 at 5:16 am

    😝

  • Reply Lezra Colrus March 6, 2020 at 5:17 am

    I do not understand how these guys have so few subscribers. They're great!

  • Reply Elijah Hunt March 6, 2020 at 5:24 am

    oh shit they're baaaaaack. (also side note if you bake in the black bars when exporting it doesn't full screen as well, you can upload them without the bars and it will scale better)

  • Reply Superlative CG March 6, 2020 at 5:39 am

    Every time we do a captcha with pictures we're teaching an AI how to identify objects. So when the robots take over its our fault.

  • Reply Adrian Elsewhere March 6, 2020 at 6:06 am

    I thought you abandoned us! 😭😭😭

  • Reply Prezombie March 6, 2020 at 6:06 am

    How does this genius work barely have any views compared to the shitty channels that post nearly the same thing every week?

  • Reply Gabe Farley March 6, 2020 at 6:33 am

    Awesome sketch but where are all the deleted scene videos you had up????

  • Reply Michelle Barton March 6, 2020 at 6:48 am

    Oh my gosh I was so excited when I got the notification for this video this morning! My first new video as a subscriber! I am absolutely astounded at the constant high level of creativity you guys have. You take a topic which seems to be pretty simple and constantly surprise me with jokes throughout and a twist ending I never see coming. Can't wait to see all the new exciting videos you guys have in store!

  • Reply Matthew March 6, 2020 at 7:29 am

    Gold 👏👏👏 glad you guys are back!

  • Reply ManOfCorn March 6, 2020 at 7:47 am

    I am SO impressed with the production/acting/story telling quality from your channel. I love you guys! You are honestly SO GOOD! And to be that broken record you hear from every other comment.. HOW ARE THERE NOT MORE VIEWS FOR Y'ALL! Seriously, great work as always <3

  • Reply qabandiman March 6, 2020 at 8:55 am

    THE BOYS ARE BACK

  • Reply vita pulchra est March 6, 2020 at 10:44 am

    Been a fan since White Room. I want to say that I enjoyed this but, its 'meh' for me because:

    1. The lighting is confusing. Not a pro but i just couldnt focus because i cant tell if its morning or afternoon time.
    2. The black bars in the bottom and the top. You guys only upload on youtube so I dont get why you guys decided on an uber-widescreen format.
    3. Chris acts the Terminator reading a Westworld script. Except the script isnt that great.

    Sorry to be the downer, I am no pro on film sketches, but I like your content so honest feedback is the best I could give back after the likes and follows.

  • Reply Robotman March 6, 2020 at 10:57 am

    If the robots need to ask humans why they believe they should stay, then they are clearly not as good and as smart as they believe they are.
    Obviously, the humans could not figure it out either – but it means that they still have space and time to learn about why we should stay. Humans are erratic and do new things all the time. With all of their past knowledge, they can merely predict what would happen with high accuracy – but it would be impossible to predict the actual future.

  • Reply elitegamer8056 March 6, 2020 at 11:44 am

    this is incredible

  • Reply 7Comic7mischief7 March 6, 2020 at 11:57 am

    Love that it almost went the way of "World's End."
    Also, Chris's 'death' movement is so fucking disconcerting

  • Reply Андрей Седых March 6, 2020 at 1:36 pm

    Welcome back, guys) We have been waiting for ages)

  • Reply IronMann347 March 6, 2020 at 2:37 pm

    It took me a few watches to realize that a Podcast being interrupted by an emergency broadcast is not possible. Nice little joke to start off the new sketches.

  • Reply Mo Kase March 6, 2020 at 2:54 pm

    Your back

  • Reply EineKartoffel March 6, 2020 at 3:21 pm

    This stuff is so high quality. Thank you for existing.

  • Reply Calcoro March 6, 2020 at 3:53 pm

    I am here if you need me.

  • Reply CoMotionJuggling March 6, 2020 at 4:13 pm

    I assume robots would need us for the same reason lonely Welshmen need sheep. For the wool.

  • Reply SuperCityscan March 6, 2020 at 5:27 pm

    New Chris and Jack short!
    New Chris and Jack short!
    New Chris and Jack short!

  • Leave a Reply