Articles, Blog

Undercover as a Facebook Yummy Mummy #2

August 26, 2019


Let’s do this Alright lads, welcome back to my channel if you are new here, my name is Tom Harlock And I do not have an intro but I do have a massive passion for fashion Did I just say fashion? I meant bullying. I’ve got a massive passion for bullying. I’ve bullied women, children, men Gamers, whole entire websites. I’ve even bullied the disabled! 😀 At this rate, the one person in the world that I haven’t bullied is myself. Pfft – that’s never going to happen, is it boys? So, today we’re going with a classic: MOTHERS! If I wanted to pick on animals, I’d go to the pound If I wanted to pick on fathers, I’d go to the shop 15 years ago for…milk ….but I’m not after either of those things today. I want yummy mummys. I want essential oils and Avon parties. I want coffee memes and five-minute placenta hacks And the only place I’m going to find all of that is Facebook, I have previously made a video on Facebook yummy mummys So if you haven’t seen that make sure to check it out in the description …and if you have watched it… ..Maybe you should stop encouraging my terrible behavior I have previously made a Facebook account and a fictitious family for a…well a physically unremarkable woman But I am a big fan of equal rights so I did allow her a voice…and what a voice Lele Smith had 🙂 I infiltrated groups, I caused havoc, and for today’s video I just feel like I need to let a lot of energy out of me, a lot of feelings and emotions and if I’m completely honest the only way I’m gonna do that is by anonymously tearing people down online. Maybe I’m the one with the problem, heh. I think it’s time we log in ughhh, I can’t wait to catch up with my girlies I bet my inbox is just full of death threats probably Wrong password. Oh, okay. Well, maybe it’s um, no, that’s the wrong one.. one more for luck I’m gonna do one more for luck Oh for fucks sake alright, Lele Smith I’m so sorry darling, but you’re dead. Oh am I gonna have to curate a brand new entire family? The role of God does come quite naturally to me and I do have a very good three-pronged attack Alright. I’ll do it. Initiate phase one: Make a fake email address Which you use to make a fake Facebook account. Visit “thispersondoesnotexist.com”, pull a bunch of random photos and then call it a family Try and make them as Caucasian as possible because then they can be embarrassing and people will believe it. Phase two: join some groups You’re gonna have to tell these people exactly what they want to hear just to get your foot inside that door Is it not your dying wish to join lady vaxxers in the fight against autism? Well, it’s now your dying wish to join lady vaxxers in the fight against autism, please let me join your group I’m dying so much. Now you have the perfect family and the perfect views, it’s time for Phase three What’s phase three? Oh, yeah Cause drama, the more unnecessary the better. It’s 9:30 in the morning I’m gonna give these guys a few hours to accept me into their groups And then hopefully my facebook feed will be full to the brim with yummy mummys Just trying to navigate this big, bad, cruel world They’re gonna need help, advic,e and more importantly to be told the absolute truth whether they like it or not I can already feel it in my bones. They’re not gonna like it at all. Okay So I was gonna leave it a couple of hours and then come back to a bustling homepage and then tear everyone to shreads However, it has been about…well about 10 days If I’m honest that diagnosed myself with a chest infection, which led to a diagnosis of pneumonia Which led to me taking a whole bunch of morphine and then I just woke up ten days later and Here I am But I’m feeling better feeling great. You’ve got my best single mom jumper on and I’m ready to invade female spaces [o_o] Let’s have a look at some minion memes to kick the day off I just want to quickly say if any mothers get offended by anything. I have to say in this video Please consider just looking after your child instead of watching youtube videos be a responsible parent Yeah, just because I’m white doesn’t mean I won’t say the n-word Yummy mummies have changed always gonna have people saying the n-word it’s been it’s literally printed on pillows on people’s walls tramp stamps at the bottom of their back I’m not even sure what namaste means never laugh at your wives choice is you are one of them. I Don’t to be horrible or anything, but this is a mini page for single bums. None of you are married None of you have the luxury of being a wife you’ve been left on the shelf and don’t ever assume I’ve got a wife again and don’t ever assume if I had a wife that lady would be in charge of her own choices One like and I will send my mum pictures of my asshole So this is what’s wrong with the younger generation You shouldn’t have to get a like on photo on social media to be able to send a photo of your own Asshole to your own mother bloods thicker than water and so is semen it’s not difficult to understand You just need to educate yourselves. If only I had an educational platform to recommend Oh, wait, I do today’s video is sponsored by Skillshare. Skillshare is an online learning community with over 25,000 classes in film production animation Graphic design is graphic design your passion while they also have creative writing if not unload more Premium membership gives you unlimited access to all the classes and courses available So you can join the ones that exactly suit your needs I recommend the iPhone photography class by Darrell McManus to all of my friends because they’re absolutely Incapable of taking a nice photo of me to save their lives if you would like to join me in the 7 million other users on Skillshare in the intellectually elite then click the link at the top of my Description because the first 500 people are getting two months free and then after that it’s only around $10 a month Thanks so much to Skillshare for sponsoring this video I really appreciate it back to it being a good person does not mean you have to put up with other people’s crap You’re a mum your literal job is to pick up after your babies shit. Share kindness is a joy My neighbour is having a party at 9 p.m On a Saturday know the time and the place and it’s not this Probably is actually maybe instead of masquerading as a woman on Facebook. I should masquerade as,, Myself and make some friends and then I might be invited to parties at 9 p.m When it’s that a day instead of pretending to be a single mum Now that’s a lot of effort take charge and don’t apologize for it this is the kind of thing that Hitler if he was alive in 2019 would definitely put that on a tea towel. never be ashamed of a scar It simply means you are stronger than whatever tried to hurt you I guarantee a large Portion of the ladies who are right in this shit had cesareans Which means they are scars going across there your baby tried to kill you. Do you think your baby tried to kill you bloody? Hope it succeeded because at least then there be less people in the world doing this kind of shit You can’t put a flower graphic on top of some text on a path style background then call it advice. It’s embarrassing I don’t listen to family therapists or doctors so Why would I ever listen to this kind of tax her revenge wasn’t loud or petty all nasty? her revenge was silent because burrows Cannot be heard You know what also can’t be heard the sound of me being impressed by literally anything I’ve read so far Motherhood is lying to every way that so many colors in this thing. My brain is burning Motherhood is lying to yourself. Every time you clean out the car and swear you’ll never let them eat in there again How about you develop a little bit self-discipline? Then you will be in this situation you are now looking after kids You can’t handle in hell confidence and exhale doubt the people actually get anything from these kinds of sayings? This one just reminds me of inhale bullshit. Exhale that real shit or wherever the fuck it is Inhale the chloroform exhale your bodily autonomy. I think I’ve seen all the memes I want to see for today time to give some advice Pearls and nuggets of wisdom just all over the place. Why does everybody have such long and intense problems? Hello What the fuck you doing in this fucking female space? Stop invading female spaces them coming in man splaining the world. Hello Hey girls was wondering anyone else is two-year-old. It doesn’t listen and headbutts walls or scratches you when you give them a row I’m kind of getting tired me too I’ve get tired as well darling no matter what I do He seems to run all over me any advice Luckily, I’ve got loads of advice. Actually. I don’t think this is really advice But I’m gonna tell her anyway Are you sure the raccoon and can anyone give advice as to how to get a seven month fee role to take a bottle? She only ever been breastfed before and now won’t take a bottle Got a top tip for you new mums out there. If your baby’s not accepting the bottle. You’ve just got to be strong-willed It’s a literal, baby If you can’t overpower a baby how on earth you’re gonna raise them have another baby and make sure this one isn’t broken Okay, guys, I need ideas on how to get my six-year-old to sleep in her own room Help please Just lock her in hang my upper stomach hurts have no appetite. What could this be? Probably attention sinking. Does anyone else see a faint line? No, you don’t see a faint line I don’t see a faint line. Your boyfriend’s not going to see a faint line. You can’t trap them into a relationship Give up has anyone else ever had a little wanna have pale chalky stools. Stop using so much talc powder Your baby’s got clown lung. Okay. Mommy’s I’ve never had a yeast infection That sounds like someone who’s definitely had a yeast infection, even when I was pregnant with my husband Okay, so they’re from Alabama or one of those funny states I understand and i’s three-year-old son now i’m gonna live in the reality where this is incest and I have an OB appointment today and got told I have A yeast infection. Is there anything else I can do to help the itching until the cream starts working? It’s so annoying Well, you’ve come to the right boy luckily, I’ve got orange and cinnamon essential oil and I have never found anything better on this planet for fix and the pH of a Rotten Fanny slider my DM hon. We’ll get you on a plan You’ll enjoy it so much and if you don’t I’ve got a money-back guarantee. I Guarantee, you won’t get your money back. Tom’s top tip If your doctor says something fucking listen to them unless the Harold Shipman if they’re an angel of death Probably don’t listen to them because they just want to murder you and then probably fuck your dead body. Oh, well, that’s good I’ve been blocked again. I think that’s all the time I’ve got for today’s video if you want to see a part free to this video I have a feeling that Becky Maher could do with some cock or Fanny so I could do a video where I joined Single mum groups and tried to get a piece or two Let me know down below in the comments like this video and subscribe if you want to see that. Thanks for watching I love you guys so much Acting I mean I do a bit so you guys thanks for watching

100 Comments

  • Reply Tom Harlock August 13, 2019 at 3:26 am

    cheers for 800k! honestly madness lads thank you for enabling me so much x

  • Reply Miranda August 14, 2019 at 6:01 pm

    I’m so glad I found this channel.

  • Reply Aoife Kelly August 14, 2019 at 6:07 pm

    The ending triggered my army ptsd

  • Reply Summer Moran August 14, 2019 at 6:35 pm

    25 seconds in. This is the kind of metal humor the world needs now thank you Tom

  • Reply Lili F August 14, 2019 at 6:39 pm

    the only timestamp you need:
    10:51
    10:51
    10:51
    10:51
    10:51
    10:51
    10:51

  • Reply Ashley Metro August 14, 2019 at 7:06 pm

    Who hurt you

  • Reply Nouaman Moukassi August 14, 2019 at 7:27 pm

    Tom r u ok 👀👀 anyways ur hot

  • Reply Omega Goddess August 14, 2019 at 7:31 pm

    “And I have never found anything better on this planet for fixing the pH of a ROTTEN FANNY” 💀😂

  • Reply Keren Flores August 14, 2019 at 7:38 pm

    this evil man has my whole heart LMAO 😂

  • Reply toast August 14, 2019 at 7:52 pm

    Tom, you are the yummiest mummy 😍🤤

  • Reply Nikki Fowers August 14, 2019 at 8:37 pm

    Plot twist. Tom is actually Lucifer and came to earth to cause hell

  • Reply Mariam August 14, 2019 at 8:59 pm

    why do you look like a 2008 David Beckham 🌚

  • Reply Lucy Allen xo August 14, 2019 at 11:23 pm

    We love a good minion quote don’t we ;-;

  • Reply SlimThiccBih August 14, 2019 at 11:27 pm

    i wanna suck your d**k so badly 😶

  • Reply NachoMama August 14, 2019 at 11:32 pm

    I am a mother. I’m not offended. I feel like being deep in the trenches, I could troll for funsies, but I’ll leave it to Tom. And don’t worry—my kiddos are cared for. They’ve got snacks in arms reach whilst being taped the the wall in the basement.

  • Reply fukrehab August 15, 2019 at 1:49 am

    I bet you also have a massive cock!

  • Reply Lexie Sontag August 15, 2019 at 2:09 am

    Part 3 please

  • Reply Depop August 15, 2019 at 2:13 am

    please more, this is hilarious.

  • Reply Chigui2 dash August 15, 2019 at 2:19 am

    He coming for the boyzzzz

  • Reply CheerlessChelsea August 15, 2019 at 2:34 am

    only tom would make a transition directly from talking about assholes and semen to a sponsor

  • Reply sammm August 15, 2019 at 2:44 am

    once i saw a whole pack of moms(like literally 20) outside my school with their babies in strollers, all walking together with their yoga pants/mats and it was terrifying.

  • Reply Meow Rchl August 15, 2019 at 3:15 am

    Stop moving your head around so much, I feel like I'm watching a game of tennis, making me dizzy asf. And button that shirt.
    Otherwise you're great.

  • Reply Dylan Sterry August 15, 2019 at 4:49 am

    8:31 "7 month year old"

  • Reply SneakySprinklez August 15, 2019 at 5:21 am

    Tom playing with his ring 👌👌👌

  • Reply Sunset Mermaid August 15, 2019 at 5:41 am

    I have a scar on my head from where I walked in to a wall (yes I am that stupid)…. Guess I'm stronger than a brick wall then

  • Reply Derrick Miller August 15, 2019 at 6:43 am

    You look like Richard Madden's gay little brother who wants everyone else to suffer because you weren't the one casted in Game of Thrones

  • Reply WantMy DamnCup August 15, 2019 at 7:14 am

    Call my Mother out like this again and we’re gonna be throwing hands Tom

  • Reply Rays of Jhope- AND SPRITE August 15, 2019 at 8:43 am

    PART 3 PLEASE

  • Reply ohmymathilda August 15, 2019 at 9:23 am

    I want to see the reactions! What kind of answers do these people give?

  • Reply Lauren Issabelle August 15, 2019 at 10:31 am

    You seem so evil in this lmao

  • Reply Lenalee Walker August 15, 2019 at 10:33 am

    thank god i wears a turtleneck later

  • Reply thehungryhannah August 15, 2019 at 10:51 am

    MAYBE YOU SHOULD STOP ENCOURAGING MY BAD BEHAVIOUR

  • Reply Gracie August 15, 2019 at 11:07 am

    bring back lily!!!

  • Reply Klaudia Wiktoria August 15, 2019 at 12:22 pm

    He's got that Lucifer accent and he even acts kinda similar but also not at all 😂

  • Reply Lucy Jeavons August 15, 2019 at 1:47 pm

    fashion for passion = bullying 😳

  • Reply Imma Hater August 15, 2019 at 2:41 pm

    Hi my name is Tom Harworts and I do not have an intro but I do have massive drug problem and daddy issues 🙂

  • Reply Katrina August 15, 2019 at 3:36 pm

    Why does everything Tom says hurt me when hes not even talking about me

  • Reply Caoimhe Pops August 15, 2019 at 4:20 pm

    why have I been waiting for this :)))

  • Reply Sarah Ayala August 15, 2019 at 4:45 pm

    love the ring 👀 on your left hand ring finger 👀

  • Reply Lexi Grabowski August 15, 2019 at 6:51 pm

    He looks super thin!

  • Reply Ana2908 August 15, 2019 at 7:13 pm

    Why his chest look like that??

  • Reply Alicia Folly August 15, 2019 at 8:07 pm

    pls try to get some single mother fanny

  • Reply Hankus August 15, 2019 at 8:47 pm

    this shirt makes you look like a recovering heroin addict; so just extremely thin and concerning to most people

  • Reply roratruth August 15, 2019 at 9:56 pm

    the lil laugh 3:55 😁

  • Reply Katie F August 15, 2019 at 11:21 pm

    Remember stewy from family guy? This is him now.

    Ps I fucking love it

  • Reply Katie F August 15, 2019 at 11:24 pm

    WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE MARRIED #dateme

  • Reply :Amï Fööx: August 15, 2019 at 11:34 pm

    If I wanted to pick on dolls… would I go to goodwill?

  • Reply I AM S H Ø Ø K August 16, 2019 at 12:31 am

    Funniest guy on here, literally name a better channel to be watching quality content on at half 1 in the morning

  • Reply spooky mulder August 16, 2019 at 4:16 am

    you’re looking so thin, tom! hope you’re staying healthy <3

  • Reply Allyshia Berger August 16, 2019 at 5:11 am

    Please make this a series omg. I love it. I'm a mum of 3 and these groups are a good laugh 🤣

  • Reply red petals August 16, 2019 at 5:37 am

    IVE BEEEN WAITING SO LONG FOR THIS YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES

  • Reply Tessia Fields August 16, 2019 at 5:47 am

    I would never stop encouraging your terrible behavior

  • Reply Mallory August 16, 2019 at 6:05 am

    I need a video on Jake and Tana’s wedding. Please.

  • Reply Krista K. August 16, 2019 at 4:16 pm

    “Have another baby and make sure this one isn’t broken” IM CRYING

  • Reply L_T99 August 16, 2019 at 4:22 pm

    3:52 – I love how Tom laughs at his own jokes 😂

  • Reply ella August 16, 2019 at 5:52 pm

    karen

  • Reply Real Diamond August 16, 2019 at 7:09 pm

    no.

  • Reply Hannah August 16, 2019 at 8:24 pm

    Part three!

  • Reply Gemma Carlisle August 16, 2019 at 8:38 pm

    "I've got a massive passion for bullying"

  • Reply J asmin August 16, 2019 at 9:19 pm

    I'm really hoping you're doing okay tom <3

  • Reply Naila Al Rajhi August 16, 2019 at 9:23 pm

    "I even bullied disabled" shows picture of lele pon

    I FUCKING love you Tom lmaooo

  • Reply RedVelvetRabbit August 17, 2019 at 12:58 am

    I will never stop encouraging your terrible behaviour.

  • Reply Senpai August 17, 2019 at 2:05 am

    3:56 well said😂😂

  • Reply lanelle August 17, 2019 at 3:28 am

    noooo! lele! come back! we miss you 🥺🥺

  • Reply Rubix Cube August 17, 2019 at 3:41 am

    You are beautiful omg

  • Reply Rubix Cube August 17, 2019 at 3:41 am

    I feel very insecure looking at you

  • Reply Rubix Cube August 17, 2019 at 3:41 am

    Why did I never get a recommendation for this fkeofneidn

  • Reply Bella Mc Carron August 17, 2019 at 4:25 am

    i mean this in the least mean way i can but tom harlock is how i imagine lucifer looking like

  • Reply isa meadow August 17, 2019 at 3:19 pm

    “7month year old”

  • Reply edxting ccp August 17, 2019 at 4:44 pm

    the only time tom sounds decently sane is when he is doing a sponsor

  • Reply Anita Väli August 17, 2019 at 7:54 pm

    8:32

    seven-month-year-old

  • Reply A. August 17, 2019 at 9:05 pm

    i feel like tom is the brit version of cody ko

  • Reply Sophie Dallimore August 17, 2019 at 9:25 pm

    essential oils and avon parties dead 💀

  • Reply riley August 17, 2019 at 10:20 pm

    means i’m stronger than the doorway i ran into

  • Reply olivia kitson August 18, 2019 at 5:04 am

    HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH FUCKIN HELL I LOVED THIS

  • Reply Sarah Catx August 18, 2019 at 10:46 am

    8:28 I CANTTT

  • Reply my account August 18, 2019 at 4:03 pm

    “Inhale the chloroform, exhale your…bodily autonomy”
    —Tom Harlock 2019

  • Reply BlueMoonAG August 19, 2019 at 1:37 am

    unless you're Harold shipman

  • Reply leya August 19, 2019 at 3:45 am

    “I’m Tom Harwok”

  • Reply Emily Trainer August 19, 2019 at 6:03 am

    I CANT BELIEVE HIS VIDEOS GET SPONSORED

  • Reply Suavecita August 19, 2019 at 11:43 am

    Someone stole your video

  • Reply Nahel Charif August 19, 2019 at 7:46 pm

    I see you took the alpha male advice on the button down, I hate that he's right but it works

  • Reply genVHS August 19, 2019 at 9:42 pm

    why do u talk like ur mom’s in the other room ??

  • Reply DiscountRonWeasley August 20, 2019 at 1:13 am

    genuinely feel sorry for some of those women, i reckon half of them actually followed your advice 😂

  • Reply DiscountRonWeasley August 20, 2019 at 1:17 am

    "PLEASE let me join your group, im dying, n- so much."Im so confused but im laughing like a bitch

  • Reply wink wonk August 20, 2019 at 9:01 pm

    your teeth are very shiny.

  • Reply Bee Potter August 20, 2019 at 11:08 pm

    wasn’t lele smiths email a gmail one? tom just had “[email protected]”, no g..

  • Reply Felix x August 20, 2019 at 11:29 pm

    I'm a bit confused. Is he gay?I luv him don't attack me for my innocent question😂

  • Reply chimiae August 21, 2019 at 12:51 am

    all the 175 dislikes are salty mummies🥰🙈

  • Reply Thalia 33 August 21, 2019 at 9:24 am

    Been waiting for this video for so longggg omfggg

  • Reply Shauna Joan x August 21, 2019 at 2:49 pm

    FINALLY!!!!

  • Reply Hattie August 23, 2019 at 9:21 am

    Part 3 please

  • Reply Mona Nemrawi August 24, 2019 at 11:23 am

    well, you saying you don't have an intro is your intro

  • Reply red petals August 24, 2019 at 2:52 pm

    We need another

  • Reply sister salads August 24, 2019 at 5:38 pm

    yummy mummy < soccer mom

  • Reply J K. BOWLING August 24, 2019 at 9:20 pm

    its the first time I have ever seen your neck

    its weird

    pls stop

  • Reply Kay aK August 25, 2019 at 8:20 pm

    I'm honored to be part of this video, thank you for accepting me as your child

  • Reply abby danielsen August 25, 2019 at 10:15 pm

    im saying this with love. dont wear your hair like this anymore

  • Reply i stan bts August 25, 2019 at 10:36 pm

    you look like you run a mafia drug ring and i’m honestly scared

  • Reply Noa Lenora Art August 26, 2019 at 2:31 am

    6:37 yeah I mean… Kinda. I almost killed my mom. I got stuck because my fat little head just would not get out so she had to get an emergency C section. Then she just had C sections for my 2 siblings after that.

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