Articles, Blog

President Trump’s Tips to Avoid Coronavirus

March 7, 2020


-What a crowd. Thank you so much
for being here. Seriously, what’s better than
sitting next to 300 people during a worldwide pandemic? Am I right?
[ Laughter and applause ] Well, last night, President
Trump held a press conference to ease fears
about the coronavirus. And after he was done, everyone in America breathed
a huge sigh of panic. [ Laughter ] The big news is that Trump
picked Mike Pence to lead the government’s
response to the coronavirus. [ Laughter ] Trump said he chose Pence because he has a certain talent
for this. [ Laughter ] And that talent is
always looking like a guy who is holding his breath,
apparently. [ Laughter and applause ] But Pence actually
has an interesting plan to fight the coronavirus. He’s going to send the virus
to a conversion camp where it can pray itself
into the common cold. [ Audience ohs ] [ Cheers and applause ] I’m not really sure why Pence is
handling this instead of Trump. It feels like if Trump and Pence
were husband and wife, Trump would hear a strange noise
in the house and say, “Mike, go check it out.” [ Laughter ] “I think it’s nothing,
probably.” [ Laughter ] “I’ll be in the safe room.” [ Laughter ] Actually, the press conference
was a little confusing because it seemed like Trump
contradicted what the medical experts
are saying. Let me show you
what I’m talking about. This is real. -As the disease spreads,
if it spreads — -It’s not so much a question of
if this will happen anymore. -We’re rapidly
developing a vaccine. -We can’t rely on a vaccine. -This will end. This will end. -This coronavirus will go
well beyond this season into next season. -We have it
so well under control. -It’s likely that this virus
will cause a pandemic. [ Laughter ] -But this is helpful. The White House also put out a
video with the President’s tips to avoid catching
the coronavirus. Watch this. -President Trump’s tips
to avoid the coronavirus. Avoid close contact
with other people. Stay away from anyone
with a cough. -Let’s do that over. He’s coughing in
the middle of my answer. -Yeah. Okay.
-I don’t like that, you know? -Your Chief of Staff — -If you’re going to cough,
please leave the room. -And don’t shake hands with
anyone who just traveled abroad. [ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] -Smack! Wow! -Paper, scissors, rock. We didn’t mess with the audio. That was a real — that sounded
like a “Three Stooges” slap. [ Laughter ] Can we see that again, Dave,
just the slap? [ Laughter and applause ] -“Why, I ought to –”
-Ow. Ow. -Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk! [ Laughter ] -And now experts are warning that if there’s
a major outbreak, people might not be allowed
to gather in large crowds. On the bright side, Tom Steyer
can keep having rallies. -Oh.
[ Laughter ] -Meanwhile, the CDC has released
a beard and mustache guide for which styles work best with
a surgical mask. -Oh.
-Take a look at this. This is real. Yeah. Can we see that one guy
at the bottom? Well, at least Hitler
won’t have a problem. [ Laughter ] Hitler’s fine.
-He’s good. [ Laughter ]
What about Hitler? Can he wear a mask?
-Oh, yeah, yeah. Some business news —
This isn’t good. Today JCPenney announced they’re closing more stores
due to poor sales. So if a friend gave you
a JCPenney gift card, one, spend it now. And, two,
get rid of that friend. [ Laughter ] Seriously, I’m not saying
JCPenney is in rough shape, but even the coronavirus
won’t go in there. Oh, come on. Hey!
[ Laughter ] -Come on.
[ Laughter and applause ] -Hey, guys, I read about
a woman who took 550 times the normal dose of LSD
and claims the foot pain that she’s had for
almost 30 years went away. [ Laughter ] Then again, that’s only because
she chewed off her foot. [ Laughter ] 550 of the normal —
What is the normal — -I guess one?
-Yeah, I guess. [ Laughter ] Probably none, right?
-Yeah, sure. Half a — -Finally, this isn’t good. Wildlife officials in Tennessee
discovered a bald eagle that had eaten so much
it was too full to fly. And never before has there been
a greater symbol of America. We have a great show, everybody.

100 Comments

  • Reply GourmetGilda March 2, 2020 at 7:27 pm

    I used my work out bra to leave the house the other day! Lol

  • Reply Parlez64 March 2, 2020 at 7:52 pm

    luvvit ! Good show Jimmy…….

  • Reply teresa lee March 2, 2020 at 8:20 pm

    Does tRump have a trip to China to check on his tie production coming up?

  • Reply AnnoyingMoose March 2, 2020 at 8:23 pm

    3:00 Jimmy should have said "N95 mask" since the surgical masks that many people wear do not fit tightly to the face and therefore provide zero protection against respiratory viruses.

  • Reply Edward Jones March 2, 2020 at 8:44 pm

    Jimmy Kimmel is a asshole anyone listen to him just as stupid

  • Reply Aphobias Polemos March 2, 2020 at 9:20 pm

    I've noticed Trump never panics like the liberal beta-male cowardly democrats do. I think I'll vote for Trump.

  • Reply bert5056 March 2, 2020 at 9:22 pm

    Has mr. President possibly a VD, because he is talking gibberish and in question marks.

  • Reply Ron Sandlin March 2, 2020 at 9:50 pm

    The CLOWN'S response to the virus is the same one used by the REPUBLICAN PARTY for everything the CLOWN does :
    STICK YOUR HEAD IN THE SAND AND PRETEND IT'S NOT HAPPENING !!!

  • Reply Lighthouse coffee co March 2, 2020 at 11:48 pm

    Should i wash D's nutz or my hands first?

  • Reply Lighthouse coffee co March 2, 2020 at 11:50 pm

    Is this the white guy mask chart.

  • Reply Mike Grizz March 3, 2020 at 12:14 am

    Fallon = Moron

  • Reply William R Warren Jr March 3, 2020 at 1:15 am

    (by 2:26) Hasn't ANYFUCKINGBODY in the ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD figured it out yet:???
    WHATEVER Space Cadet Spanky McBonespurs SAYS is the OPPOSITE of the gorram truth!!
    I'm still AMAZED the Bibles he took his "oath of office" with didn't burst into flames as soon as he touched them. OTOH, I'm impressed he wasn't afraid to touch them. (WAIT!! He swore on TWO BOOKS!! The one beneath was The Bible, the one he actually touched was "The Art Of The Deal" in a "The Bible" dust jacket!!)

  • Reply Steven Moylan March 3, 2020 at 2:24 am

    Voice sounds raspy Jimmy. U should get checked for the virus.

  • Reply Jim Buskist March 3, 2020 at 3:32 am

    Rapidly paddle up the River of DeNile.

  • Reply Yanxi Qpoof March 3, 2020 at 3:46 am

    La has 33 cases. I say quranteen Kimmell, this dude and Elen Degenerates, aka Bush Jr. Close buddy. Pronto amegas! Cage the infectoids! 😁

  • Reply steve henclewski March 3, 2020 at 3:50 am

    You're a scumbag.

  • Reply DREW JEERS March 3, 2020 at 5:13 am

    One of the few people that can take old fashion jabs at all parties on sll sides in a fun way and not come off hateful.

  • Reply Roo doodle March 3, 2020 at 11:33 am

    The surgical masks aren’t effective say the UK government

  • Reply Ninja Skater March 3, 2020 at 11:50 am

    Bill gates already knows what will happen from 2015 just watched the video wowww

  • Reply Aliza Torn March 3, 2020 at 1:21 pm

    Trump 2020

  • Reply Aliza Torn March 3, 2020 at 1:22 pm

    The democrats wants it to spread it seems?

  • Reply Lost Planet need be free March 3, 2020 at 1:32 pm

    So much for Ellen abused by her stepfather while just watching I was abused by my bio & my kid was abused too! And Ellen just keep cyberstalking. Like it's a funny Iranian show on Netflix.. Let alone SO many others from Hollywood! Justin,Reeves, DiCaprio, Depp, Oprah, etc… So many we don't know! Trashed our lives in Iran..Since 4 yrs, 24/7 .. No privacy ANYWHERE! At least have the bravery to fix the damage! But NO.. They like Trump, Obama,get away.. Like babies without diapers.. Mess everything
    Lots of popular talk shows, Hollywood celebrities and directors,know about us for years, been playing us, abusing, making fun of our pain, cyber stalking, even in shower, bathroom,… Paying ir, my junkie father and his Russian Iranian drug dealer trafficking gang in Iran! Supporting their abuse against us for 4yrs! 24/7!!

  • Reply Lost Planet need be free March 3, 2020 at 1:33 pm

    And Iranian offcls KNEW and DON'T CARE.. They don't have the power to give us a safe place?! OR? NO EXCUSE..
    They don't have the money to pay for a bunch of cab drivers salary for 4 months! For one school related to the disabled! Yet they take or rights, give our money, resources to Iraq, Syria, Palestine!& Hezbollah! Hey Bashar & nasrollah! Give our money back! They lied that school cab is free, didn't pay cab drivers salary & don't intend to! school doesn't have paper for exams! Our education system is soooo deprived! They can't manage ONE school in this country properly! Yapping about nuclear energy?! The offcls live different from people, NO WONDER

  • Reply Lost Planet need be free March 3, 2020 at 1:34 pm

    Hey world leaders, (trashers)g7,20,+100s Trump & Obama invited without any consent, paying drug dealer ralpist terrorist junkie father,Russian Iranian drug dealer trafficking gang,&IR!!!Stop cyberstalking women girls in Iran! Shameless creatures! Supporting Iranian high rank offcls & families in USA! So much for their death to chants while ministers, high ranks related to ldrs, army, etc kids having fun in USA while people r suffering from sanctions! Even Arabs aren't that hypocritical! Liars!!!Iran high ranks knew about us for years but kept lying to hide their crimes against us.. Keep us prisoners for their entertainment? !?? SO CHEAP

  • Reply Lost Planet need be free March 3, 2020 at 1:34 pm

    American gov (trump & Obama)supports anti American, Iranian high ranks families in USA!while their people r suffering with sanctions! Trump is such a HYPOCRITE just like dumbama! U2 r such a FAKE SHOW! Let alone YOU TWO supporting Russian Iranian drug dealer terrorist trafficker gang abuse & attacks against us ! Inviting everyone rich, famous, powerful to watch us in bathroom & shower! No privacy to even change clothes! Let alone threatening & harassment on ALL our utube channels & deleting my comments about this DISASTER! Like u CARE about Iranian protesters? U were & still are supporting this government against us & people in USA & Iran!! Cut the crap!!!

    Trump, Obama  r playing Americans & USA.. All those anti Trump, Obama supported shows r proof he wants hide his mess attacking him.. Or like Melania caring to stop vaping? They knew it's going out of control & might be exposed, so let's make a show pretending…

  • Reply Lost Planet need be free March 3, 2020 at 1:34 pm

    We r in Tehran, elahieh, dashti st, sepid, bA next to Russian embassy garden! What a coincidence! Russian Iranian drug dealer headquarters! Only police that work with them come around.. And all those who work in 3buildings ABC, r related to this gang & obviously wouldn't help anyone know about us! Or find us! This area is out of order..alarms in Alley, fake elevator alarm to say someone is around.. We weren't even counted in person count in country!!!

  • Reply aldrigdø March 3, 2020 at 1:38 pm

    bernie is sweet <3 I think KAty Perry could sing…I kiss Bernie Sanders…AND HE LIKE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Reply Lost Planet need be free March 3, 2020 at 1:47 pm

    Hey cyber stalkers, Trump, etc.. Stop spreading lies about us to cover your crimes! Stop contacting this Russian Iranian drug dealer trafficking gang, ir, & liar family, junkie father! Or blood connections in USA!! They r playing u! Lying to u!! We never got anything from u or gave u anything, messages etc! They r just keeping u on hold to get drugs, etc from rich powerful and famous ALL over the World! There is no marriage either!just gave u Fake docs!! Easy in Iran for drug dealers!! Another lie to keep us prisoners! WE DON'T WANT TO BE HERE A SECOND NO MATTER WHAT!!!
    Stop keeping us prisoners to entertain yourselves with our pain!!! Ruining, trashing our lives, 24/7, 4yrs, SO Far!!!!!!
    We r not related to Greta, Naomi,.. They r for Distraction from us!!
    Or prisoners of Iran protests etc
    . We r hidden.. Totally not kn8wn.. Even ir offcls NEVER contacted us in ANY way! Nobody EVER met us!!

  • Reply Lost Planet need be free March 3, 2020 at 1:49 pm

    We r in Tehran, elahieh, dashti st, sepid,n12, bA , frfr, next to Russian embassy garden! What a coincidence! Russian Iranian drug dealer headquarters! Only police that work with them come around.. And all those who work in 3buildings ABC, r related to this gang & obviously wouldn't help anyone know about us! Or find us! This area is out of order..alarms in Alley, fake elevator alarm to say someone is around.. We weren't even counted in person count in country!!!

  • Reply COPY PASTA RAPPA March 3, 2020 at 3:37 pm

    Shaking hands with your left hand is a sign of disrespect. Hahahha

  • Reply Bernard Wilson March 3, 2020 at 4:03 pm

    Make jokes out of a worldwide killing virus how f**** bad are you people?

  • Reply AKEWSD March 3, 2020 at 5:21 pm

    Mike pence always look constipated

  • Reply Raymond Rocha March 3, 2020 at 5:30 pm

    Typical Trump response, reporter: mr. President, what are you going to do about the Coronavirus, president response: talk to Mike. This is why Trump never ages! He does not want to think about any crisis! That's why he sleeps good every night!

  • Reply HoshiReed March 3, 2020 at 6:43 pm

    The CDC facial hair chart made "If you've only got a mustache" song spring to my mind and I can't get rid of it, I'm in earworm hell now.

  • Reply John Stefanyszyn March 3, 2020 at 6:58 pm

    A germ-a-phobe. Didn't Donald Trump once declare that he was a germ-a-phobe. ( I believe he made that statement when the "golden shower" situation came up.)
    However, POTUS Trump stated at a recent rally that it was safe to be in the large crowd (even though the coronavirus is spreading everywhere ).
    The virus will definitely attend his rallies, in the large gatherings of thousands of people from all walks of life and from all parts of the USA.
    I wonder if any one informed germ-a-phobe POTUS Trump of this?
    Perhaps they did but he disregarded their warnings since , as he has always claimed, he knows better.
    BUT will he take the RISK to expose himself to the invisible coronavirus brought in, if by only one Trump supporter who has not been tested?
    Do you think that, being a germ-a-phobe, he will cancel the rallies or start doing them via video screen.

  • Reply Dave Badge March 3, 2020 at 8:38 pm

    jerry why it is so funny because trump is a complete idiot , the funny part people trust , and listen to him as a hero of theres and that is scary funny

  • Reply benolea2007 March 3, 2020 at 11:03 pm

    USA has the highest death rate of Coronavirus in the world

    More than 8% : 108 cases, 9 deaths

    Source:

    Live statistics and coronavirus news tracking the number of confirmed cases, recovered patients, and death toll by country due to the COVID 19 coronavirus from Wuhan, China. Coronavirus counter with new cases, historical data, and info. Daily charts, graphs, news and updates

    WORLDOMETERS.INFO

    Coronavirus Update (Live): 92,823 Cases and 3,164 Deaths from COVID-19 Wuhan China Virus Outbreak – Worldometer

    Live statistics and coronavirus news tracking the number of confirmed cases, recovered patients,…

  • Reply John Richie March 4, 2020 at 2:09 am

    That's the proverbial slap on the wrist. Good for you, prime minister.

  • Reply WINSTONIAN March 4, 2020 at 3:35 am

    Is this how Fallon always is? I don’t watch because I never really liked him, but I didn’t imagine it was this bad.

  • Reply King Peppy March 4, 2020 at 5:47 am

    So, what you're saying is the draft dodger ran away from the problem, uh huh, I see.

  • Reply Thomas Tamir March 4, 2020 at 5:53 am

    If you want to avoid unnecessary chances getting coronavirus, stop going to late night talk shows. There are a lot of people there, why chance it?

  • Reply sabre2x135 March 4, 2020 at 5:53 am

    Chump is slightly dumber than Pence, but there’s not much in it

  • Reply Travel Voyage March 4, 2020 at 5:55 am

    watch my videos and find out where the coronavirus started.https://youtu.be/9EPz8PSue2o

  • Reply S S March 4, 2020 at 6:16 am

    Well trump has two dicks. One of each 😆
    PM modi announced it while introducing him.

  • Reply Phuong Anh Tran March 4, 2020 at 9:33 am

    https://youtu.be/BtulL3oArQw
    An addicting song about corona virus

  • Reply François Vallée March 4, 2020 at 10:22 am

    Trump: Coronavirus is Democrats' 'new hoax'
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G5TZ6fTYrsE

    The Limits of President Trump’s Communication: Scientific Topics
    Trump said, "The Coronavirus is the Democrats' new hoax".
    – This is a miscommunication and a serious political mistake.

    Les limites de la communication du président Trump : les sujets scientifiques
    Trump a dit : "Le Coronavirus est le nouveau canular des démocrates".
    – C'est une erreur de communication et une faute politique grave.
    —————————————
    Why Trump's press conference backfired
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ApauTrulwc

    Mike Pence – 28 minutes – ARTE
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-WmUyOgGCY

    President Trump's Tips to Avoid Coronavirus
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bkGFsSYODjI

    Trump is DEFINITELY NOT WORRIED About Coronavirus
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y-sbabzs3Jg

    Trump’s Flailing Response to the Coronavirus Outbreak: A Closer Look
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lKAlwCCd_hU

    Coronavirus: Is This How We Die? | The Daily Show
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uEmUJcHysds

    A Coronavirus PSA From Vice President Mike Pence
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3lEXlKy6HP8

    Donald Trump désigne Mike Pence pour lutter contre le coronavirus, tollé immédiat
    https://www.huffingtonpost.fr/entry/donald-trump-designe-mike-pence-pour-lutter-contre-le-coronavirus_fr_5e570bc7c5b66137fb5d6400

    Mike Pence said smoking "doesn't kill" and faced criticism for his response to HIV. Now he's leadi
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRKkKvWrIsE

    Censor In Chief? VP Pence To Control Coronavirus Info
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dkFwqF3ufZA

    Watch Mike Pence Hilariously Prove Why He’s a Terrible Coronavirus Czar
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAw5Z6vPpU4

    Prince Charles misses a handshake with Mike Pence in awkward moment
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIKwwQ2LvfU

  • Reply John Bell March 4, 2020 at 10:35 am

    Typical Trump…..GETS EVERYTHING WRONG AND HIS CULTIST ARE AS DUMB AS SHIT!
    The next thing he'll say it'is China's fault and the world should take action against the country.

  • Reply Quiet Corner March 4, 2020 at 12:34 pm

    Трамп (Trump in Cyrillic) & Pence probably lik to open Witch Trials and find those who are behind this!

  • Reply DAVID GOERTZ March 4, 2020 at 1:50 pm

    World wide pandemic? LMFAO…so why does Jimmy Fallon have an audience? they should be at home wearing masks and worrying …THE SKY IS FALLING , THE SKY IS FALLING ….FAKE LIBSHIT NEWS STRIKES AGAIN

  • Reply potoker March 4, 2020 at 1:53 pm

    A virus was released in china but no one is asking where it came from or how it started. Its deadly and they use it to attack Donald Trump. In the beginning it was all fun and games but now it's just desperate. If you tripped over a toy in your house you'll be more aware of where the toys are, but these guys will attack trump for not buying their kids a toy box.

  • Reply cool grandpa March 4, 2020 at 2:16 pm

    I voted for Alfred E Newman

  • Reply jean duggan March 4, 2020 at 4:41 pm

    Mayb our pm modi has given him the antidote for the virus….cover itself with cow dung. !!!

  • Reply sunitha prasanna March 4, 2020 at 4:55 pm

    You guys don't have any patriotism . No respect for your leaders also. Always making fun on them.

  • Reply Ariana Grande's fan acc March 4, 2020 at 5:03 pm

    I don’t get why everyone hates Trump, he’s not that bad

  • Reply Gary Kindt March 4, 2020 at 5:53 pm

    The 'normal' dose for d-LSD 25 of 25mcg x 550 would be 13,750 mcg or 13.75 milligrams. A very small bit of the 'powder' she ingested. A single dose is very tiny.
    quoted but not attributed…

    Pharmacology of LSD
    Psychological Effects
    A moderate dose (75–150μg p.o.) of LSD will significantly alter state of consciousness. This alteration is characterized by a stimulation of affect (mostly experienced as euphoria), enhanced capacity for introspection, and altered psychological functioning in the direction of Freudian primary processes, known otherwise ashypnagogic experience and dreams. Especially note-worthy are perceptual changes such as illusions, pseudo-hallucinations, synesthesias, and alterations of thinking and time experience. Changes of body-image and ego-function also often occur. The acute psychological effects of LSD last between 6 and 10 hrs, depending on the dose applied. The minimal recognizable dose of LSD in humans is about 25μg p.o.. The “optimum” dosage for atypical fully unfolded LSD reaction is estimated to be in the range of 100–200μg. Traumatic experiences (called “bad trips”) can have long-lasting effects on LSD users, including mood swings and rarely flashback phenomena. It should be noted, however, that these generally take place in uncontrolled conditions. Conversely, it has been shown that under controlled and supportive conditions, the LSD experience may have lasting positive effects on attitude and personality.
    Acute Neurocognitive Effects
    One problem with acute cognitive testing is that after a clinical dose of LSD (100μg or more) is given, subjects become too impaired to cooperate due to the intensity of perceptual and physical changes. Lower doses may not capture the real cognitive effects LSD may provoke. Nevertheless, many tests have been given and the most representative studies are cited.

  • Reply Mac cheese March 4, 2020 at 7:15 pm

    This is insane!!!! Democrats urging if you get corona virus to attend trump rallies to spread it. .candy c dem tweeted it. Can never trust dems again insane

  • Reply Jerry Burt March 4, 2020 at 8:03 pm

    Please contact me if anyone needs N95 masks–

  • Reply m r March 4, 2020 at 8:16 pm

    I never ever rhought id miss obama this much just to hear him speak

  • Reply Redmond Ray March 4, 2020 at 9:24 pm

    TRUMP 2020!! 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

  • Reply Vince F March 4, 2020 at 10:24 pm

    In President Donald Trump's defense, he is after all, an imbecile.

  • Reply Amy Saalberg March 4, 2020 at 10:27 pm

    Disband the Pandemic Response Team, apparently.

  • Reply Renate Cox March 4, 2020 at 11:46 pm

    He makes shit up as he goes. You got experts next to him and he still lies.

  • Reply Denise Sevier-Fries March 5, 2020 at 12:10 am

    Love Jimmy…deserves so much more attention.

  • Reply Deadbeat Donny March 5, 2020 at 2:03 am

    When I need info on infectious diseases, I always consult with someone who raw dogs pornstars. 🤦‍♂️

  • Reply Matthew Mongoo March 5, 2020 at 2:56 am

    Smack them little tiny hands.

  • Reply cfcreative March 5, 2020 at 3:02 am

    Hope https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U57JkmSwOWU

  • Reply Tex 123a March 5, 2020 at 3:23 am

    That’s Nice, Democrats joke about Americans dying

  • Reply 1_12_Whiteguyz_0utdoors March 5, 2020 at 4:22 am

    https://youtu.be/fb2Z27dARf8

  • Reply D truthing March 5, 2020 at 4:39 am

    Jimmy sounds like he might have a little cold or "something".

  • Reply Gerhard Rinkens March 5, 2020 at 7:06 am

    this is how to indear Trump: by buddy-buddy-rambo-talk with him…. that is when you are a great guy…

  • Reply TIMR4W March 5, 2020 at 7:08 am

    Some people still love u trump

  • Reply gloria March 5, 2020 at 7:09 am

    2 :20 🤣🤣🤣…r u ok..ur voice sounds flu.

  • Reply TOMMIE AUSTIN March 5, 2020 at 8:54 am

    Trump lives in his own 🌎 filled with untruths.Many are sadly bamboozled 😞

  • Reply Relentless March 5, 2020 at 9:20 am

    I'm living in Madrid right now and I'm a little paranoid.

  • Reply leonard chiarini jr March 5, 2020 at 12:44 pm

    TRUMP 2020🇱🇷no cure for that!!

  • Reply KERRY GITCHEL March 5, 2020 at 1:01 pm

    Walter and Peanut for president ? Jeff Dunham

  • Reply Brian Picarella March 5, 2020 at 3:33 pm

    Ur not funny. What's your suggestions president fallon? Dumb ass, fallon, enemy of LEGAL AMERICANS and white americans also rust belt americans

  • Reply Art by alpha March 5, 2020 at 4:28 pm

    Mike pence looks like a mannequin, and what's that modi slap lol 😂😂😂😂

  • Reply CD Smith March 5, 2020 at 7:01 pm

    Meanwhile, last night Trump says "I have a hunch the 'carona' virus has less than 1% mortality rate." and then went on to add "I think that people who are feeling sick should still go to work if they want to."

    Let that bit of orange idiocy sink in.

  • Reply Christopher Porter March 5, 2020 at 7:19 pm

    That Trump impression was spot-on. 😂

  • Reply Niki March 5, 2020 at 9:48 pm

    BREATHED A NEW SIGH OF PANIC! 😩

  • Reply Peter Milner March 5, 2020 at 11:03 pm

    I have an idea. Let's nuke the virus.

  • Reply Shawn Donley March 5, 2020 at 11:45 pm

    Want to avoid stupidity or a brainwashed puppet. Don't watch this IDIOT show!!

  • Reply qishuo wang March 6, 2020 at 2:22 am

    Coronavirus is scared of nothing. I can kill people people. The information Trump gave is inaccurate and stupid

  • Reply Irwin Cheong March 6, 2020 at 2:43 am

    Stay safe..

    Covid19 #HandWashingDance https://www.instagram.com/p/B9YBS8sAd23/?igshid=136wchmchq10c

  • Reply A Donkey March 6, 2020 at 3:03 am

    TRUMP 2020. GREATEST PRESIDENT

  • Reply carolyn allen March 6, 2020 at 4:12 am

    So funny but this virus isnt funny especially if your a boomer guess they should call it the boomer virus 😆

  • Reply Suriya Stoolzfus March 6, 2020 at 7:17 am

    You are a great entertainer for America 👍♥️

  • Reply Michael Moewes March 6, 2020 at 7:46 am

    Well we know that trump is plain braindead, so no worries you're all save. due to the Hitler comment. you better get your facts straight as you're as dumb as the blond guy. Hitler was an Austrian soldier in WW1 and he had a regular widespread mustache. one day he and his platoon where attaced with mustardgas and he got poisened. Because the gasmask leaked because of a small gap at the edges. As I was born and raised in Germany we all had to learn about this whole shit that happend over 87 years ago. But we're still trapped due to Israel who we still pay repairs in an amout over 40million€/year. as this is a huge benefit for them, they will never forget or forgive us.

  • Reply 13B Gun Bunny March 6, 2020 at 11:16 am

    🤣 😐 What?

  • Reply brat shorty March 6, 2020 at 12:12 pm

    I wish Trump gets infected by corona virus.

  • Reply Agent Cooper March 6, 2020 at 1:05 pm

    Looks like this is recorded in 1970 looking at the backround. Curtains??? Serious? It’s 2020 guys😄

  • Reply Truth Teller March 6, 2020 at 4:25 pm

    American talkshow monologues are never funny. Why don't they just scrap them?

  • Reply anjan bhujel March 6, 2020 at 5:44 pm

    This is not a fun ….you guys always make a fun …. sometimes you must be serious like this kind of issues…don't make a fun of Corona vairus….b,cause. People are dieing…..

  • Reply Bub Zilla March 6, 2020 at 6:21 pm

    Wow this show has become a 1️⃣ (Joke) Pony
    🍊👱‍♂️BAD

  • Reply Momo Lulu March 6, 2020 at 7:23 pm

    let's sing and dance with Ghen Co Vy song; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZY0zoEaj2o

  • Reply knubeer youtuber March 6, 2020 at 9:05 pm

    Here is a joke of our times. Does your kid have ATHC Syndrome. Where kids can't focus in school. THC is a psychoactive compound found in weed. So if a kid has got ATHC he won't be able to focus in school ryt. A THICK HD.

  • Reply GibbonBasher March 6, 2020 at 11:08 pm

    Ahahahahahaha. Trump bad. Very laugh. Original joke.

  • Reply Patricia Egan March 6, 2020 at 11:58 pm

    Unbelievable

  • Reply Dean Rowland March 7, 2020 at 12:16 am

    Xocoxo

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