Articles, Blog

If First Dates Were Honest

August 27, 2019


– Yeah, totally holding
in a fart right now. – I don’t remember what you look like? – I am pretending to be busy, but I am literally Instagram stalking you. – Hi! You don’t edit your photos. – You do. – [Waitress] Doing my job. – Oh, um, ordering something
that makes me sound feminine, yet, strong. – Um, ordering something
I memorized years ago to make a good first impression. Call back to a conversation we had online. – Oh, quick comment, to
let you know I’m on board. – Standard question about your life. – Generic answer, trying to hide my crazy. A thing that worked with other guys. – Things that worked with other girls. – Oh, thing that worked with other guys. – Thing that some girls actually like. Controversial joke to test the waters. – Negative reaction. Shutting this down. – Being nice to the wait staff. – Not noted. – Awkward silence. Talking about the menu… – To avoid silence… – or ongoing conversations… – about our actual lives.
– about our actual lives. – That’s what I was going to say. (laughter) – Hey, I’m going to take the
biggest poop I possibly can and tell you it was a pee. – I’m going to text all my friends and let them know this
could be going better. – Lie about how long that line was. – Actually checking myself
in the reverse camera. – Hey, a joke at my own expense. – Teasing with humor. – Self parodying with humor. – I am touching you right now to let you know that
this is back on track. Oh, geez… – Trying to be valiant. – I am mortified, but I’m
playing it off as adorkable! – Realizing I am touching your leg and… – sexual joke.
– sexual joke. – Different sexual joke. – Trying to keep this energy going. Letting my guard down. Comfortable silence. – Sexual silence. – Okay. A reference to how much
food is still on my plate. – A reference to how much
food is still on my plate. – [Both speakers] Because we
are not comfortable eating in front of each other yet. – Showing my protector quality, and financial stability. – Accepting this general because it benefits me. Texting my friends to let
them know that I like you. – Thinking about our future? – Yeah. (farts) (farts)

54 Comments

  • Reply xXCamicakeXx April 25, 2019 at 10:12 pm

    This boy left his credit card

  • Reply Kakashi Hatake April 26, 2019 at 9:45 am

    So it’s only a date if someone says date? The word date required?

  • Reply Alan Q. Wake May 17, 2019 at 2:17 pm

    Lol.

  • Reply Noodleboy Farts June 1, 2019 at 9:50 pm

    Gta5

  • Reply Malcolm Nicoll June 4, 2019 at 5:48 am

    Can't believe I wasted so much time and energy trying to placate women's endless demands. Bottomless pit. No more! MGTOW saved my life.

  • Reply rune June 8, 2019 at 5:06 pm

    WHAT IF YOU grew up WITH family who demand HONESTY?

    i find it hard why people lie so much even with their own friend…

  • Reply sofia June 12, 2019 at 1:38 am

    Did anyone realize she left her phone on the table???

  • Reply Me Goofy June 13, 2019 at 8:17 pm

    They forgot to include "debating on whether or not to tell you I have 3 kids and an ex I'm still very close with". Could be either gender

  • Reply Margaret Rosaline Petronella Sherline Beere June 17, 2019 at 7:33 pm

    What’s the guys name in this video
    (the first date guy)

  • Reply Toph My cat June 26, 2019 at 6:47 am

    They didn't even eat the food

  • Reply drogon, the last surviving dragon July 2, 2019 at 3:54 am

    Wait….. He didn't take his card back

  • Reply Jack DaGreat July 2, 2019 at 4:19 am

    I wont even be able to make it to the date

  • Reply nadeen mohiar July 5, 2019 at 8:52 pm

    Not to be disgusting but i farted when the man farted

  • Reply Satyendra N Doni Banerjee July 11, 2019 at 3:30 pm

    Lets change this title honest successful first date

  • Reply Erik Schmidt July 14, 2019 at 3:48 pm

    If Buzzfeed was honest

  • Reply Paper Boi July 15, 2019 at 1:50 am

    Just had my first date last night!!! It went perfectly smooth!!! It’s our official day 1 now!!! To anybody out there who’s wondering whether you should make a move or nah, JUST DO IT BRO

  • Reply Riffelj July 15, 2019 at 5:30 pm

    <sexual silence>

    OK

  • Reply darknight July 19, 2019 at 8:23 pm

    Am i the only one who noticed that he never got his credit card back?

  • Reply LaLa Music July 20, 2019 at 1:30 pm

    😶😶😶😶

  • Reply Wajiha Hussain July 20, 2019 at 1:46 pm

    so true

  • Reply Wajiha Hussain July 20, 2019 at 1:47 pm

    1:25

  • Reply Peter Trexler July 20, 2019 at 6:09 pm

    Ha sad. People just are weird

  • Reply Fagot Reich July 21, 2019 at 10:06 am

    lemme cringe

  • Reply Namiber - Any Time is TimeLapse Time! July 21, 2019 at 10:50 pm

    Realising that both genders have flaws but still living a great life together

  • Reply AutumnOnFire July 23, 2019 at 12:17 am

    YOU DIDN'T TAKE ONE BITE.

  • Reply David Neyra July 23, 2019 at 1:10 am

    they didn't even eat the food! what a waste LOL

  • Reply Ian Washburn July 24, 2019 at 1:22 am

    I've never had a date this good

  • Reply Kirbae July 24, 2019 at 1:44 am

    This feels like straight up watching a college humor sketch

  • Reply Jeff B July 24, 2019 at 4:23 am

    *Making joke about SJWs and feminism in the comments section*

  • Reply Martin Stangeland July 24, 2019 at 5:27 am

    That went well

  • Reply ALBER PAJARES July 24, 2019 at 2:07 pm

    Have to be justice, else this is the jungle.,.

  • Reply Kerry Foster July 24, 2019 at 6:19 pm

    Never go to a restaurant on a first date! go somewhere you can sit next to or adjacent to makes physical contact much easier!

  • Reply Qais Hijazi July 24, 2019 at 11:19 pm

    He left without his credit card??

  • Reply TY July 25, 2019 at 1:01 am

    pretends to watch this video because my mom walked into my room as I was jerking off

  • Reply Joose Pajunen July 25, 2019 at 9:40 am

    This is weird

  • Reply Nick Wilson July 25, 2019 at 11:02 pm

    Typing a comment about how “I’d rather be single than going out on awkward dates” when in reality I’m depressed and lonely.

  • Reply R Grif July 26, 2019 at 3:00 am

    Is this how white people meet each other? WTF Corny as hell

  • Reply Vishwas Singh July 26, 2019 at 3:19 am

    I don't know how accurate this is. Nobody ever agreed on going out on a date with me….. And for good reason!

  • Reply I am Solo July 26, 2019 at 4:44 am

    Quickest poop I ever had? that's me…

  • Reply SumDude July 26, 2019 at 2:58 pm

    my first date took place in an anime convention….

  • Reply Harrison Cloud July 26, 2019 at 6:09 pm

    "Trying to keep this energy going" haha I relate to that

  • Reply Jenny Valdez July 26, 2019 at 6:50 pm

    Did he ever get his card back?

  • Reply Gaël des Montagnes Noires July 26, 2019 at 6:59 pm

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  • Reply ghjk hjk July 30, 2019 at 9:05 am

    Came for science
    Stayed for the farts

  • Reply Irwin Crook July 30, 2019 at 9:18 pm

    The only good part 3:00

  • Reply Anonymous Red August 2, 2019 at 1:21 am

    He wins, she's way hotter than him, she makes him look like a 3.

  • Reply johnny d August 4, 2019 at 3:12 am

    Ive only had a few dates in my life i just go back to their place after bar close 😉

  • Reply God August 8, 2019 at 6:57 am

    0:55 he made a feminist joke

  • Reply Lidija Cullen August 9, 2019 at 1:00 am

    Ha ha I can't remember what you look like, and I am a woman!! Luckily they remember!

  • Reply southerncajuncharm August 19, 2019 at 2:16 pm

    “Mortified but playing it off as adorkable”.

  • Reply the extream g.o.a.t TV August 22, 2019 at 2:39 pm

    They banged

  • Reply Danj126 August 22, 2019 at 9:49 pm

    Lol when buzzfeed was actually good

  • Reply Elda Dyrmishi August 23, 2019 at 11:25 am

    This is what future dating will be like

  • Reply Eino Usmi August 24, 2019 at 5:02 pm

    sexual silence

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