Articles, Blog

Amy Schumer’s Not-So-Romantic Paris Visit

October 18, 2019


You were supposed to be here last week and
at the last minute, that morning, you cancelled because you had fever and
you were sick.>>Yeah.
>>You were gonna have healers come over. How’d that work out?>>I have cupping marks on my butt.>>Did it work?>>[LAUGH]
>>Yes, it did work.>>Cupping works?>>They were really good. Cupping works.>>Wow.>>And I’m not talking about you know,
I mean like, with the cups.>>[LAUGH]
>>Yes, I feel a lot better but it turns out if you work really
hard non-stop for 15 years and don’t take a break,
it’s not like good for your body. [LAUGH]
>>Yes.>>I didn’t know.>>Your body.>>I came here before I ever went
on the road ever 10 years ago.>>Yes.
>>It was like is it gonna be good and you’re like mm-huh. And you’re telling the truth, it’s hard.>>It’s hard. It’s hard to be on the road, because you’re in a different
hotel room all the time. Which is why I said everyone
should start coming to me.>>Just come to you.
>>And I got a show. So they would come to me.>>This is great.>>Because touring is harder.>>She’s smart, you’re smart.>>[APPLAUSE]
>>I’m stupid.>>Yeah.>>That’s nice. You bring everything to you, the seasons.>>Yeah, everything, these are all gifts. These are all people
that are like sacrifices. That’s a bowl of onions, I think.>>[LAUGH]
>>I don’t know that that’s good.>>Yeah, so congratulations. You’re in love, you’re happy. You have a boyfriend since I saw you last.>>Yes.>>Thank you.>>[APPLAUSE]
>>Thank you. He’s very lucky.>>[LAUGH]
>>I think it was kind of because of my appearance on here last time. He saw my outfit and he was like,
I wanna get involved in this.>>Really?>>[LAUGH]
>>Yeah.>>Did you have a outfit that was skimpy?>>I was roller skating
in front of Hillary.>>It was that, that’s right.>>Obviously he was like hm. Dating app? Yeah, we met and I think neither of
us were really looking for anything. But we really liked each other right away. And I liked him so much,
I was like I’m gonna make him wait. And I did. All through dinner.>>[LAUGH]
>>No, we didn’t go to dinner.>>[LAUGH]
>>But he was awesome. We’ve been very honest with each other. I was like upfront I was
like look I’m realistic. I know for a fact that I
don’t have any diseases left.>>[LAUGH]
>>[LAUGH]>>[LAUGH]>>You guys have never been tested, Ellen’s audience?>>[LAUGH]
>>Sorry, I know it’s the holidays.>>[LAUGH]
>>But we just had our year anniversary, that’s very cute.>>[APPLAUSE]
>>Yeah.>>[APPLAUSE]
>>Thank you, we need it. It’s still early,
we’re still, like, lying.>>[LAUGH]
>>Neither of us had ever been to France because we’re both trash.>>Right.
>>[LAUGH]>>And so, we were like, let’s go. And so we go and it was like we wanna be romantic. It’s an intimidating city.
And then we had one of those hotel rooms where the bathroom, when you’re in it and
someone goes like [COUGH], you hear it loudly in the whole room.
You can hear everything. And we both got violent food poisoning. Violent. And so it hits him first. And he’s in there just, blah, blah, blah. And then the way it
manifested itself in me.>>[LAUGH]
>>Is basically I was in there just like. How do I say this? Just kind of like [SOUND] machine gun. [SOUND] And I knew it was over. I’m yelling at him. It was so great dating you,
I wish you the best luck, you’re gonna meet the greatest girl,
but I knew.>>[LAUGH]
>>I knew it was over.>>[LAUGH]
>>[LAUGH]>>Who can make it through that? And then I thought,
I’m just gonna be the one with that end. And he’s going back in there, he’s put his
head where I was just [SOUND] and then->>[LAUGH]>>Under a year, we’re together. But then he hears me go! And I grab the trash, and
I had to, so all ends.>>[LAUGH]
>>I was like the fountain on Friends, you know, basically.>>[LAUGH]
>>And that is when I learned not to ever throw up
in a wicker basket.>>[LAUGH]
>>Happy holidays, guys.>>[LAUGH]
>>That’s when you learned.>>[APPLAUSE]
>>[APPLAUSE]>>My God, my God.>>We’re still together.

100 Comments

  • Reply Bill Harms February 4, 2018 at 2:49 pm

    Both Amy and Ellen are self promoting.

  • Reply Ya Boi February 5, 2018 at 4:40 pm

    She performed a skit from her leather stand up damnnnnnnn

  • Reply Josh AA February 5, 2018 at 10:10 pm

    Fucking hilarious Amy machine gun ??????????

  • Reply Truely ME February 12, 2018 at 11:53 am

    Omg… TRASH???? u r not trash your amazing

  • Reply Sirjana Ale February 12, 2018 at 7:52 pm

    ??????

  • Reply Bella Kok February 15, 2018 at 3:43 am

    She starts the interview with “I have cupping marks on my butt.” ?? I love Amy

  • Reply Ash Mukherjee Dance Company February 15, 2018 at 8:05 pm

    She is ABSOLUTELY hysterical!!!!! ?????

  • Reply R Ma February 16, 2018 at 11:28 am

    Laughed my ass off

  • Reply AJ KOBR February 17, 2018 at 9:18 am

    Omg i love her????

  • Reply Aromer10 x February 20, 2018 at 6:49 pm

    I love her dress

  • Reply John FD February 22, 2018 at 9:38 am

    tuuruuruurrrrrrrrrrrrrr

  • Reply Patrick Dowling February 23, 2018 at 1:30 pm

    Amy is piss funny! And how good is Ellen’s laugh? Not many people can make Ellen crack up for that long.. super talent!

  • Reply saghar14 February 23, 2018 at 9:16 pm

    Her timing is really good

  • Reply cheer edwy February 26, 2018 at 9:25 pm

    I can't get over this interview!
    I lost count to how many times I've watch it!! This is one of the best I love it??????

  • Reply Shivangi Sud February 28, 2018 at 7:14 pm

    I laughed so hard that I cried. ???????

  • Reply Ya Fookin’ Losah March 1, 2018 at 11:49 am

    Y’all can stop asking why we hate Amy Schumer, search up “Pewdiepie Amy Schumer” he recently made a video on her pathetic ass

  • Reply Vanessa G March 3, 2018 at 5:38 am

    It could have been worse..at least she shit on the toilet and not in the wicker basket.

  • Reply PCM Azuma Navas March 26, 2018 at 2:58 pm

    idk why ppl started laughing when she said awkwardly 'cupping works' ?

  • Reply Gachka Tako March 26, 2018 at 7:53 pm

    I Love Emy she is cool

  • Reply 96actress March 31, 2018 at 7:14 pm

    I LOVE Amy and her dress!!!!

  • Reply desertrose April 1, 2018 at 1:39 am

    I love Amy’s dress.

  • Reply Micah Goldson April 4, 2018 at 8:45 am

    Um yeah, cupping doesn’t work. It’s a placebo.

  • Reply Sandra Jovic April 13, 2018 at 9:44 pm

    Amy Schumer Genius!

  • Reply Edgar Martinez April 18, 2018 at 5:06 am

    This is still the funniest interview to me omg

  • Reply Nadja April 18, 2018 at 10:47 pm

    I'm crying ???

  • Reply muja MR April 21, 2018 at 5:16 am

    i cant?? omygosh

  • Reply WIN WIN WIN April 22, 2018 at 3:53 am

    I've never seen Ellen laugh so hard lol

  • Reply Lindsay Dehaen April 24, 2018 at 11:50 am

    I had this on while in the office and I had to fake coughs to suppress my laughter. I thought I was going to choke xD Gotta love her. She's so real!

  • Reply Mitali Biswas April 30, 2018 at 1:07 pm

    So funny….she's unpredictable and that makes her funny

  • Reply Zhen Zx May 2, 2018 at 3:34 pm

    She looks likes SARA AALTO

  • Reply Nova Fury18 May 4, 2018 at 4:08 am

    I love how that you can hear someone at 3:20 repeat "MACHINE GUN!" over and over again as she laughed her ass off?

  • Reply Julia L May 6, 2018 at 10:35 am

    Amy is too funny. Hot boyfriend too

  • Reply xoxojessiexoxotix May 12, 2018 at 11:36 pm

    Omggg she killed ????

  • Reply Hayley Campbell May 16, 2018 at 9:33 pm

    is this the boyfriend she married?

  • Reply J. P. May 22, 2018 at 2:25 am

    Ellen's laughter sounds so forced.

  • Reply Julie B May 27, 2018 at 3:56 am

    Love Amy and Ellen!!!!! By far my favorite comedian and talk show host ?????????????????

  • Reply Юлия Соловьева May 27, 2018 at 7:26 pm

    Suddenly the "noise" she made sounds like the beginning of "Hafanana" by Afric Simone O_o

  • Reply Alexandra June 17, 2018 at 6:41 pm

    She's hilarious! I really love her humour:) So funny:D

  • Reply Eliana Villegas July 2, 2018 at 9:36 am

    ??

  • Reply warmestglow July 26, 2018 at 3:09 pm

    CRY LAUGHING CANT STOP

  • Reply Mind Over Batter July 30, 2018 at 8:04 pm

    There are very few female comedians that really make me laugh. I mean bust a gut laughing… Ellen, Rosie O'Donnell, and Amy Schumer.

  • Reply imika gt July 30, 2018 at 9:43 pm

    i dropped my phone on forehead laghting

  • Reply bigbennie96 July 31, 2018 at 3:53 pm

    I love it when Ellen laughs like it's so funny

  • Reply MarvelFox Morty August 2, 2018 at 7:54 am

    She's super hilarious, only her can make Ellen and audience laugh so hard

  • Reply Rainier7777 August 3, 2018 at 4:20 am

    ROTFL! 😀

  • Reply Mad's Bakery August 10, 2018 at 9:02 am

    She makes Ellen laugh soo hard ?????

  • Reply Jack Tang August 16, 2018 at 9:48 pm

    what is happening in 0:49?

  • Reply aiimi khan September 2, 2018 at 8:02 pm

    OMG i laughed so hard…..

  • Reply Milly Z September 24, 2018 at 3:24 pm

    OMG this is amazing!!! She is so honest and so hilarious.. I love it!

  • Reply Christian Valencia September 25, 2018 at 12:17 pm

    Any Schumer and David Spade are the only comedians that make Ellen choke-laugh while being interviewed by her. It’s hilarious! ????

  • Reply Christian Valencia September 25, 2018 at 12:21 pm

    Idc, Amy can sit on my face. I’ll eat that peach. Kept it PG-13 people, relax.

  • Reply fAshSon September 26, 2018 at 5:45 am

    Oh please, EVERYONE HAS THEIR MACHINE GUN MOMENTS BEFORE AND IT'S NOT AN EXAGGERATION…. HAHAHAHAHA

  • Reply Kyle Bonte September 26, 2018 at 8:49 am

    The machine gun thing killed meee

  • Reply Rimmi Johnson September 26, 2018 at 11:00 am

    She’s so great off the cuff. Naturally funny. Love it

  • Reply Farhana Fathima October 1, 2018 at 3:51 am

    Amy is one realistic n hilarious person. Much better than Jennifer Lawrence who force herself to be funny. Amy is just naturally funny??

  • Reply Hildebeast Clinton October 5, 2018 at 8:36 pm

    Shamu – you need to learn the tank tricks first.

  • Reply Jeri Riley October 6, 2018 at 6:00 am

    Well I'll never get those 4 minutes back from my life…
    Her material:
    •Slutty an drunk
    •my vagina
    •puke
    •tryin to own a heckler (fails)
    •my vagina again
    •"goodnight.. where's my paycheck I didn't deserve"

  • Reply Shades of Mindfall October 8, 2018 at 6:19 am

    Ellen LOVES Amy!

  • Reply Ry T October 11, 2018 at 4:58 am

    If I ever see Amy in public I am going to yell out machine gun Amy! She is so down to earth and funny. ?

  • Reply m clark October 18, 2018 at 7:38 pm

    DUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ROTFLMAO!!!

  • Reply BEANZZ LABORATORY November 4, 2018 at 5:43 pm

    Amy and her bf make me believe in love again ?????

  • Reply King 1985 legend November 18, 2018 at 11:50 am

    She so sexy to me

  • Reply Kathy Ford November 24, 2018 at 12:19 am

    She is not very funny

  • Reply Valerie Torres December 4, 2018 at 4:10 pm

    i love her so much she is hilarious. it comes natural to her ?❤️❤️ she’s always keeping it real and never sugar coats any of her stories

  • Reply Medea Endor December 8, 2018 at 10:35 pm

    I know for a fact… I have no deseases… LEFT

  • Reply Danté Riccelli December 11, 2018 at 4:04 am

    @3:20 “MachinE Gun! MACHINE GUN!! HAHAHA”

  • Reply Geminilove 69 December 12, 2018 at 7:16 pm

    I think I'm the only person that finds her funny and beautiful I don't like people bullying her and attacking her for nothing

  • Reply Diego sanchez December 15, 2018 at 3:23 am

    So, dumb people thinks she's not funny? And still watch Adam sandler movies, America is wrong men.

  • Reply Stefania December 20, 2018 at 12:51 pm

    And in two years she broke up with him, got with and married a different dude and got pregnant. A lot happened to her in just two years!!

  • Reply Jesus Parangaricutirimicuaro January 5, 2019 at 5:25 am

    I was like the fountain on friends ????

  • Reply Lewis n Buddylove January 10, 2019 at 6:54 pm

    Amazing ???

  • Reply Rama_RZ Rama_Rz January 13, 2019 at 3:40 pm

    AMY SCHUMER SHE IS AWESOME ♥️

  • Reply DOLMA LAMA January 28, 2019 at 7:15 am

    Haha she is very funny I like her

  • Reply CJ Jeiven January 28, 2019 at 10:31 pm

    Melissa McCarthy too

  • Reply Lily January 31, 2019 at 9:33 pm

    i love Amy <3

  • Reply superstar85ca February 1, 2019 at 5:34 pm

    This made me laugh so friggin hard.

  • Reply Sandali Dev Sinha February 7, 2019 at 1:19 pm

    This was sooooo great… But she used the exact same things in her leather special… Like EXACT same thing, so that's kinda uncool… But my belief that she is the coolest women in the world and the world needs more people like her has not wavered..

  • Reply I Echevarria February 16, 2019 at 2:36 am

    o gosh , it makes me cry, shes so funny and I love Helen reaction, so funny

  • Reply Neli neli February 16, 2019 at 8:43 pm

    She has great legs and skin and she knows it ❤❤❤

  • Reply Kayli Smyth February 23, 2019 at 11:42 am

    Dead

  • Reply Wachaga Keith March 17, 2019 at 7:16 pm

    ???

  • Reply MrNikkimaxine April 6, 2019 at 7:39 pm

    You now what to

  • Reply Abhirupa Bhattacharya April 10, 2019 at 8:48 am

    Anyone in 2019 ?

  • Reply Killa Milla May 4, 2019 at 8:12 am

    That's the last sound I'm expecting

  • Reply Kristine Day June 4, 2019 at 10:43 pm

    I agree Greg I don’t think anyone else makes her cry-laugh

  • Reply Maria Arreola June 21, 2019 at 3:09 am

    Omg! I think this is the first time I actually ever laughed, watching Amy! ?

  • Reply Lizzylu46 July 10, 2019 at 11:46 pm

    I love Amy

  • Reply 1grey_ miller July 22, 2019 at 7:26 am

    Oh God, I laughed so hard . What was that? lol

  • Reply True Faith July 27, 2019 at 6:00 am

    ♥️♥️♥️

  • Reply chantal stijner July 31, 2019 at 5:51 am

    ??????….. trrrrirreeeuuuuu ????

  • Reply Ross Believes In Fairytales August 3, 2019 at 12:50 pm

    She is so funny!

  • Reply cansu kurtoğlu August 8, 2019 at 7:38 am

    I’m watching this so I can feel better about my own food poisining. I feel so tired

  • Reply anna zeiter August 9, 2019 at 12:50 pm

    ahahaha love them soo much

  • Reply Anushka Chatterjee August 13, 2019 at 3:06 pm

    If you want killer abs just watch a couple of videos of Amy Schumer

    Side effects: you might cry from laughing so hard

  • Reply Røbbin Mølk August 26, 2019 at 2:01 am

    FUNNIEST WOMAN ON TELEVISION! No one comes close to being that funny. My abs hurt from ?

  • Reply LiXiao Long September 15, 2019 at 5:35 am

    Yeah I'm tired to travel too…sometimes is too much.

  • Reply yehoo911 September 19, 2019 at 8:20 am

    Omg! I’m crying!!! ??

  • Reply marcianito2020 September 26, 2019 at 2:44 am

    It was so great dating you!

  • Reply Rachel Vasquez September 26, 2019 at 5:24 am

    She is so hilarious i love her and to make ellen laugh like that is priceless ???

  • Reply Quixotic Tambourine September 27, 2019 at 2:37 pm

    I’ve never enjoyed diarrhoea jokes before this! She’s special! ???

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