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5 Vagina Mysteries That Are Totally Normal | Madge the Vag | Scary Mommy

August 16, 2019


The vagina is a mystery! What should it look like,
how should it smell, and is it okay that it
makes that crazy noise when I do yoga? (queef noise) Time to investigate! Twat’s up, ladies? I’m Madge the Vag, and today I’m uncovering
five things about the vagina that seem unusual, but are totally normal. Are those curtains uneven? I kinda like it. Do all pink fortresses look alike? What I’m saying is, can
the curtains be uneven? What’s the deal? – This is the deal. First of all, kudos for even looking at your girlfriend. – Looking all the time.
– Love it! Just like it’s not uncommon to have one breast that’s slightly
larger than the other, it’s not uncommon to have, you know, a labia minora or a
small lip, so to speak, that’s slightly longer or, you know, darker than the other. It’s completely normal. (queef noise) – Okay, Dr. Angela. I’m just gonna ask. Is my vagina passing gas? – No! Your vagina’s passing air, so to speak. – Why does this happen? – Air is getting trapped within pockets. The vagina’s composed of folds. You know, technically speaking, they’re called rugae, r-u-g-a-e. And then it’s like your
vagina sighing and exhaling. (exhales) – Oh!
– Thanks for a good time. – So I was making whoopee,
and I think I squirted! Hello? Mom? My friend’s vagina is like a juice box. You poke it with anything, and it’s squirting all over the place! What is that? Is that normal? – That’s fantastic if your
friend’s vagina is squirting. It just means that she, you know, was hit in that spot,
that g-pot, so to speak, and she’s completely uninhibited and is allowing her body to release. It’s not urine, but it’s,
you know, it’s the juice. – So she’s not peeing?
– No, she’s not peeing. And sometimes, you know, if you leak a little bit during sex, it’s completely normal. I mean, the relationship
between the bladder, the urethra, the vagina,
is all very intricate. – What is that? Is that normal? Here’s where we get down and dirty. – All right, I like dirty. – My gash has a splash, doc. Should I be worried? – Discharge? – Yeah, oh, yes! That’s what it’s called. – Okay. But the thing with discharge
is it’s completely normal, and it’s, like, one of the most unspoken about things
that occur with women. Everybody has discharge. – Is all discharge bad? – The vagina’s like a self-cleaning oven. And so discharge, as long as it doesn’t itch, burn, or smell bad, it’s completely par for the course. – What should a normal
discharge look like? – Depending on where
you are in your cycle, you will notice that
sometimes your discharge is more copious in amount or
just there’s much more of it, sometimes it’s thinner, that’s usually around
the time of ovulation, sometimes it’s thicker. But again, if it doesn’t
itch, burn, or smell bad, it’s great. – Are these clean? No, but not bad! Should I be odorless? – You know, this is what
I always tell women. Vagina is supposed to smell like vagina. As long as you, yourself,
are not offended, it’s probably fine. It’s your scent. Scent of a woman. We should coin that. – What happens if my
beaver smells like a skunk? My clam smells fishy? – Girl, then you need to
have that checked out. – Oh, so that’s a bad sign.
– Yeah! Yeah, you don’t want your
girlfriend smelling bad. – Can’t I just spray stuff on it? – No, no.
– No. – There’s something going on, whether it’s an STI, that’s
sexually transmitted infection, or whether there’s just an
imbalance in your vaginal pH. Yeah, and it’s nothing to be ashamed of. So just talk about it, I mean, there’s nothing that’s off-limits when you go to the OBGYN. It’s like talking to
one of your girlfriends. – Well, ladies, we’ve closed
the curtains on that case, which, by the way, don’t have to match. If anything else mystifies
you about your muff, comment below or drop an e-mail in my box and I’ll investigate.

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